?

Log in

No account? Create an account
*MY JOURNAL*
This is me...
*a tad bit random*
Links:
my facebook page my myspace page lols i've started going on neopets again (sad i know)!!! add me => kittykat_charm
*month atm*
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031
13th Jul, 2009 @ 11:39 Weird day on sunday.
*mood atm*: bitchyWTF???
Yesterday was a bit of a fail. Mixed feelings about it all.

I went to London for this thing that i'm doing in the summer, and the night before i'd gone to my cousin's boyfs bbq - as you do. It was ace btw, his bbq, his friends, he makes a mean mars bar muffin - took one home with other treats, left them in the fridge, the ONE thing i wanted from the box was the one muffin that was left, by the time i came back yesterday - twas gone :'( - anyway, back on track.

So i had a great time met some fun people, went "home" around one to book my coach tickets (train tickets would have been sooooooo expensive) booked a coach - well, a megabus, at 6.30 so i had to wake up around 4.30 to get ready and walk there cos buses dont run that early on a Sunday.

Firstly, when i was walking down this side street by gay village this weird asian guy in his car started stalking me down the road shouting stuff to me. I was like: WEIRDO!!!He even actually did a U turn to follow me down the street, which freaked me out. Then he was all like " i ent gna do anything to you, here, take my phone and money then u know i wont do anything, plus there's cameras"
You gotta think - Psycho's don't really care about cameras or not. I told him that i was late for my train ( not completely untrue) and he was like "i'll drive you there" i was like "leave me alone!" then he got pissed off i think, shouted something at me and drove down the road the opposite way than originally looking out the window at me the whole time. I will tell you i was well jumpy then.

Got to Queensway, went the wrong way down Queensway - was soooo panicked. Ended up getting to the right place 2 minutes late and the coach was already gone. Panicked a lot, called round, got my friend Hezza to check the next bus time 9.30!!! That was the time i was meant to arrive, and even then i would already have been late cos the woman phoned me and told me that it was 9 not 10, like, the day before.

Waited for 3 hours in the rain at the bus stop - where was i supposed to go? Home? No point, might have missed the next coach then, and there is NO WAY that i was wasting 20 quid. So, waited, got the coach, got there about 12.30. Had to walk from Victoria Coach Station all the way to this thing by covent garden, and it turns out my directions where from the train station anyway so i spent half an hour not realising then walking in the opposite direction to get to the Train station and starting off from there. I managed to find my way to the Strand - REALLY LONG ROAD NEAR TRAFALGAR SQUARE and then walked like a mile too far, got lost and this bus driver guy who actually happened to realise i'm from brum (didnt think i have a brum accent) and happened to actually live like over the road from where i live - and covered why the weird asian guy was so obsessed. Shouldn't have worn such a low cut top. "You have excellent boobs" - not letchy at all :)

Then had to call people from Birmz to google me some directions cos i had NO CLUE. NONE of my friends actually picked up their damn phones. Had to wait for charlotte, who txted me back then i got her to phone me (Wasted like 7 quid of credit earlier phoning, Heth, the bus company and the ITS people) and eventually she got me to where i needed to go.

Ugh!!! When i got there it was OVER!!! I was like. What a waste! But lynne was really nice, took me through the presentation quickly, then took me to have a meal with some of the group leaders for like mini question time, which was really nice of them, they like let me intrude and they answered my questions and one even said she'd help me prepare, which was good because i wasn't sure what i needed to do. so that was good. After that I REALLYREALLYREALLY wanna go - so feel free to find me ways of my making enough money by end of July to go. ;P

Saw this street entertainer as well before it started raining. Inappropriate much? He was kissing random men and making dirty jokes in front of kids and getting the little kids involved in the dirty jokes. Twas funny as hell though. Espesh the pulling out of "the woman's" bra - it was not actually HER bra - lol. And the "girl vs money" bit - A lot like life, the little boy picked the money over the girl.

Got the earlier coach for an extra 2 quid and the 2nd coach driver was a menace. He was going 110 in a 60 area and i was crapping myself - am always scared coaches will go too fast and just tip over LOL. Got back home and my muffin was gone :(

LOL

Also, ate SOOO much:

cornflakes
sfc wrap
nachos
twister
magnum white
crunchie mcflurry
plate of pasta

WHOA.

So overall. Weird day.
*this entry*
10th Jul, 2009 @ 20:08 I'll give you the world Ianto Jones
*mood atm*: anxiousIANTO???
There were tears in his eyes as he looked down on the one he longed for. His heart ached and made it hardly possible to breathe. He thought he would die again.

One arm was still around her. Gwen.

He did not know why, but somehow he imagine Ianto was there, his soft hands stroking one of his fingers. But it was Gwen.

He pulled his arm away and crawled toward the cold figure. Was this what he had become. Once so warm, so full of love. Now a slab of flesh upon the red blanket.

"Ianto" he cried, whispered rather.
"Ianto" - one word. Two syllables. Like a drum against his chest.

He did not touch. Solely looked at the figure for something like a memory, and image of what once was. He looked at this cold, dark figure, searching for Ianto.

She spoke. Gwen. Said something. It was English, yet he couldn't comprehend, understand.

She spoke again. Nothing. His eyes remained firmly on the body before him.

She spoke again. She had risen. Standing above him casting shadows on the floor. He understood her. Not her words, but she had placed a hand on his shoulder and gently pulled at him.

"We have to go. The 456, are still out there, we only have a day Jack."

He jerked his shoulder forcefully. Angrily. Not at her, but at the situation. He could not face them. Why should he care? It was just 10%. Children who had not lived, had not loved, had not felt heartache. They would not know, felt no pain, maybe even would not remember. Would not think of a life before. Here. On earth. In the 21st century. Where he was stuck. Alone.

Thoughts raced through his mind. He knew he had to do something. Something had to be done! He had to save him

"Ianto"

He slipped a hand under his neck; cold, limp. An pulled him up, resting the head on his chest, where his heart barely beat. He used one arm to support the shoulders and slipped one arm under the knees and with one almighty thrust upwards he was on his feet, grasping the body, jiggling it until the head rested on his shoulder. He rested his head upon the head and closed his eyes inhaling the smell that he knew so well. Except, somehow it was different.

Can you smell death? Maybe. Maybe it was death, tainting the smell, he thought to himself.

He opened his eyes and rightened his head, staring straight forward. His legs seemed to move without warning. He wasn't quite sure what he was planning yet but he knew he had to get to Cardiff. To torchwood.

What should i do with the body? Who can i trust?

Gwen's voice drifted towards him. He assumed she was yelling at him.. By now he was moving at an incredible speed, both his legs and his mind.

Where shall i put him? Can't leave him here.

"Where are you going" or "Stop" maybe. He wasn't quite sure. She was delayed by the guard at the door. That he knew. He could turn back, entrust her with the body. No. Not an option. He trusted gwen, with his secrets, with his life even - though he never needed to - but not, somehow, with his Ianto.

Rhiannon? I know where she lives. Abouts. I could tell her, keep him safe. I will get him back to us.

No! he thought. That would involve telling her things. Things he, and Ianto, may not have the heart to Retcon out of her. Not this time. Plus, she had children. Would they not be frightened at the sight? Their uncle dead in his arms.

"This will have to do".

He was unaware that he had said this out loud. In the crowd that had followed the man, running, carrying... a corpse? He placed the bosy in the car, delicately - as one would place a a bunny in a field, and snapped the belt in place before running to the drivers side and getting him. The crowd stared, no longer worried about traffic or waiting times. Is this what was happening in London. Was this due to the bolt of fire? Would more people turn out like this?

John beeped the horn and hurridly reversed, weaving in and out of the people and cars that almost gridlocked the road. The highway code? He broke every rule. Reversing at an easy speed of 70 on the pavements, almost hitting everything in his path. But he was a good driver. Had to be. Had plenty of practice. And at the very first opportunity screeched a u turn and sped off to the coast, as fast as the little silver sports car would let him.

*The man who sent his friends off to die, could not die himself.*

He could not die. He feared nothing.

He reached the bay almost an hour faster than he should have. He reached for the glove compartment. Surely? Yes. Here it was. Any man with a car like this had to have sunglasses. He placed them gently on the body before stepping out of the car and taking off his gorgeous greatcoat and covering the body with it.

It was cold, but Jack felt no cold. It was late, but Jack did not feel tired. As he ripped away the police tape that surrounded the blast site and jumped into the crevace, wading through rubble and shirking those terrible men in black, he was not afraid. He was determined.

He walked towards the store - Or where it would be. Should be. Something MUST be left. SOMETHING!

Come on Torchwood do not let me down! Not this time. Please?

Glass tore at him, bricks grazed him, dirt was caking on his sweaty palms.

Please. Please. Please.

He was praying to the gods. He knew that. He wasn't religios but at times like these there is always a prayer to the gods.

Please. Please. Please.

He saw it. Beneath the rubble, the dirt, the fith, the grime. Wedged between rock and metal. A box. And glimmering, ever so slightly in the dusk, the tip of a gold chain.


"YESSSSSSS." he hissed as he clawed his way through the wreckage
"Yes" he laughed as he tugged the chain towards him.
"Yes" he sighed, as he held the ruby pendant that was attached to the chain into the air gleaming as if there had never been an explosion.
"Yes" he cried, as he held the chunk of gold plated ruby over his left chest. Over his heart.

It seemed like a decade, an eternity even. As if a time vortex had been activated. As if the world, stood completely still. And when he felt the tug at his heart, pulling it closer to his ribcage, he knew it was time. He had inadvertantly shut his eyes. He opened them and leaped and bound over the quarried mess towards the space he knew he had parked the body.

He knew there would be consequences. Someone had to pay. The world had to pay. Every door a door closes, a window opens.Well here, before you open the door, you must first close the windows. He knew there was a price and he didn't care.

He stood about a metre from the car and watched teh front passenger seat with a tentative gaze.

"Jack?" he heard ianto mumble, stirring from his state.

"Ianto!" he called as the dashed to open the passenger door, kneeling on the ground, grasping that sacred spot at the back of Iantos neck and caressing the side of Ianto's face with his other hand. The kiss he gave then was more passionate and more full of love than any human being had the ability to give. Jack's lungs screamed for air, his head lightened, but his heart, winning over all other senses ached for Ianto.

"Ianto" he gasped as they pulled apart. One final tear coarsing down Jack's eager face.

" six five zero zero zero zero" echoed the children of Great Britain

He knew there would be a price.

20%
*this entry*
10th Jul, 2009 @ 19:48 SPOILER FIC: I'll give you the world
*mood atm*: blahIANTO???

*this entry*
10th Jul, 2009 @ 11:10 IANTO IS DEAD?
*where i am atm*: does it matter anymore?
*mood atm*: crushedIANTO!!! :(
I cannot believe they killed off Ianto -

well, actually i did foresee it didn't i?

Here's hoping they ressurect him.

I'm in two minds about that actually because its like on one hand his dead was rubbish and too predictable - like when he told his family he loved them. Plus Jack hasnt said i love you back, and that's the one thing that Ianto's been waiting for. :(

But then again - how?

The hub has been blown up so the gadgets are out of the question, and if Jack's kiss thing works then how comes he's still able to lose everyone he loves? Our only hope now is a doctor who cross over which is unlikely due to no media hype, no phone for Jack and no Martha - she's the only person on earth other than Jack with the doctors number. WHERE IS HE/ SHE? ie doctor and martha. is 10% of the worlds population / communal child thought not high on their list of bad things that could happen to the earth? FAIL.

So i am pretty sad about that. :(

But i imagine Jack to be heartbroken and seeing as it says that Gwen stands alone i am hoping that that's because Jack's trying to save Ianto - seeing as it is kind of his fault that Ianto died for a) taking him on such a suicide mission and b) running out to help the others before coming back in and realising - too late - that he should probably save Ianto.

In honour of this i am posting some of mny fav Ianto convos. WARNING *Contains spoilers*

Ianto: They say you’re supposed to talk to people when they’re in a coma, don’t they.

I have absolutely no idea whether you can hear me Jack. I never heard of anybody coming out of one and carrying on the conversation, so I suspect it’s something the doctors tell us to do to make us feel better rather than help you. We don’t feel quite so useless and helpless. We get the feeling there’s still some sort of purpose in our lives. We’re not just waiting for the science to work or the miracle to happen or the nightmare to end.

I’m not much of a talker Jack, you know that. But I’ll talk to you now on the off chance that it helps.

Just promise me if you’re hearing this that when you come round, and you’re going to Jack – you’re gonna come out of this? Promise me you’ll never bring up anything I say to you now. How’s that? We got a deal?

This must be the longest I’ve ever looked at you and not seen you smile. I’ve watched you in your sleep. Did you know that? So many times. Just woken up beside you in the middle of the night and watched you. Watched your eyes moving behind your eyelids as you dreamed and tried to imagine what a man like you could possibly dream about. The things you’ve seen. The lives you’ve lived. The people you’ve loved. I wondered if you were dreaming about me. I hoped you were dreaming about me.

But let’s be honest Jack. I’m nothing more than a blip in time for you. Every day I grow a little older. But you’re immortal. You’ve already lived a thousand lifetimes. How could you watch me grow old and die. How could I watch you live and never age a day. I supposed we both know that will never be a problem. Not in this job. No-one in torchwood ever lives to draw their pension, do they. Even if by some miracle I survive to see my hair turn grey, or god forbid fall out. I don’t kid myself you’ll still be around to see it. One day you’ll go again. Just like you did before. And this time you won’t be back. Maybe that’s what you’re dreaming about those nights when I watch you sleeping. Maybe that’s why even when you sleep I see you smile. But you haven’t gone yet Jack. I know that. I know you’re coming back to me.

***

Ianto: So you don’t remember anything about the trance?

Jack: No. Did you talk to me while I was out of it? They say that’s what you should do...

Ianto: I talked a little. But I’m not really much of a talker

Jack: I know.

Ianto: But that’s just me.

Jack: Yeah. But you never will just be a blip in time, Ianto Jones. Not for me.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////

Ianto: Amazing. She's a natural. 24 seconds.
Owen: Give Ianto a stop watch and he's happy.
Ianto: It's the button on the top.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Ianto: If you're interested I've still got that stopwatch.
Jack: So?
Ianto: Well. Think about it. Lots of things you can do with a stopwatch.
Jack: Oh yeah. I can think of a few.
Ianto: There's quite a list.
Jack: I'll send the others home early. See you in my office in ten.
Ianto: That's ten minutes. And counting.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Martha: So am I right in thinking that you and he...?
Ianto: We... dabble.
Martha: Yeah?
Ianto: Yeah.
Martha: So what's his dabbling like?
Ianto: Innovative.
Martha: Really?
Ianto: Bordering on the avant garde.
Martha: Wow.
Ianto: Oh yeah.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////


////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Jack: This time tomorrow he'll be back in 1918
Ianto: In his own time. Would you go back to yours if you could?
Jack: Why? 'dya miss me?
Ianto: Yep
Jack: I left home a long time ago, i dont know where i really belong. Maybe that doesnt matter anymore.
Ianto: I....Do you get lonely?
Jack: Going home wouldn't fix that. Being here, i've seen things i never dreamt i'd see, Loved people i never would have known if i had stayed where i was. And i wouldn't change that for the world.
*EPIC KISS*

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Jack: Ianto, you're gonna get locked inside! Ianto - and you!
Ianto: There must be a way to override the mechanism
Jack: For god's sake get out!
Ianto: There'll be nothing left of you!
Jack: I can survive anything!

*EPIC KISS*

Jack: I'll come back - i always do

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Gwen: Ianto, hi. I'm sorry. I didn't realize—
Ianto: Doesn't matter.
Gwen: I wouldn't have come in if I'd known—
Jack: Always room for one more. We could have used an hour ago for naked hide-and-seek.
Ianto: He cheats. He always cheats.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Jack: it's quite excitable.
Ianto: Must be your aftershave.
Jack: Never wear any.
Ianto: You smell like that naturally?
Jack: Fifty-first century pheremones. You people have no idea.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Ianto: What did it feel like? I mean, getting blown up.
Jack: It wasn't the best of days.
Ianto: Kay, but did you feel it? Or did everything just go black?
Jack: I felt it.
Ianto: Shit
Jack: Yeah
Ianto: Do you ever think that one day your luck'll run out? That you won't come back.
Jack: I'm a fixed point in time and space. That's what the doctor says. I think that means its forever.
Ianto: So one day, you'll see me die of old age and just keep going.
Jack: Yeah
Ianto: We'd better make the most of it.
Jack: I suppose.
Ianto: Like right now.
Jack: Ianto the world could be ending.
Ianto: The world's always ending, and i have missed that coat.
Jack: Rhyss you wanna take the car and go to thoe shops down by the wharf? We need discs for these things. Should take about 20 minutes
Ianto: 30 minutes
Jack: 30
Ryhss: I'll go later, the beans are almost done.
Jack: The beans are almost done.
Ianto: Bloody beans!

///////////////////////////////////////////////////

Ianto: This must have been eating away at you. Why didnt you tell me? I could have helped.
Jack: No you couldn't
Ianto: I tell you everything.
Jack: Yeah, so tell me what should i have done?
Ianto: Stood up to them. The Jack i know would have stood up to them. I've only just scraped the surface haven't I?
Jack: Ianto, that's all there is.
Ianto: No, you pretend thats all there is.
Jack: I've lived a long time, I have done a lot of things. I've got to go i won't be long
Ianto: You're doing it again. Speak to me Jack, where are you going?
Jack: To call Frobisher, i won't be able to make the call from here or they'll trace it. Is that okay?
Ianto: You're the boss.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Jack: It's all my fault
Ianto: It's not
Jack: Don't speak, save your breath.
Ianto: I love you.
Jack: Don't. Ianto? Ianto! Ianto - stay with me! Ianto stay with me please! Stay with me! Stay with me please!
Ianto: kay. It was good yeah?
Jack: Yeah.
Ianto: Dont forget me
Jack: Never could
Ianto: In a thousand years time you won't remember me.
Jack: Yes i will, I promise i will. Ianto. Ianto. Dont go. Dont leave me please. Please. Please don't.

/////////////////////////////////////////////
*this entry*
9th Jul, 2009 @ 20:26 FIRST DAY JOURNALLING
*where i am atm*: home :D
*mood atm*: excitedexcited
Okay, so this is my first day and i've gotta go home so i'll keep it quick. Its all good times, i watch too much tv / films, i love going out with my mates / making new ones.

This week am loving the new torchwood, which - may i add, has been fantasmagorical. Its all about Janto ftw <3

Here's hoping they don't kill Ianto off...

Off to watch the programme...

KISS KISS xox.

C.
*this entry*
9th Jul, 2009 @ 19:32 Writer's Block: Duos
*where i am atm*: A la computer
*mood atm*: excitedTORCHWOOD!!!
Sam and Diane, Ross and Rachel, Chuck and Blair—who is your favorite TV couple?
Chair - duh! How could you not love Chair? Rachel and Ross are too done and i don't know who sam and diane are. However overall ones to consider the greatest inclue Piper and Leo, Rory and Logan, Lorelai and Luke and of course, the much beloved Janto - <3 Gareth David-Lloyd and John Barrowman!
*this entry*